;i keep up with a fake smile, wanting you to notice me;
ALL I WANTED WAS FOR YOU TO CARE
BUT YOU DONT SEEM TO BE BOTHERED
PRETTY LADY
katharine joy.12 years young
1st year h/s. Atenean . Ateneo De Naga Univ. H/S.
loves my family,my FRiENDS, my CP, my PC, && my mp3.
moody.sometimes suplada.smart daw
<3 o3.o16.
loathes flirts,snobbers,backstabber,plastic peeps.
wants my own laptop/PC, & a new cellphone. names|names|names
katja to my family and friends.
kath to other friends.
joy to mam tintin
its been almost a month since my last blog post. grr. its because of the typhoon reming.it was really disastrous, esp. here in our region. but id rather not tell you more about the destruction of that typhoon, it would be a very VERY long post if i'd do so. lolx.
anyway, we just had our internet back this afternoon. thats why i only had the chance to post again, today.
pssh. 'nuff bout that internet, typhoon whatsoever thingy. lolx.
my heart's still shattered. hmmp.
i have to forget about him. i need to. because its only for my own good.
but somehow, i just can't. i just CANT! coz i dont want.='c
its really hard for me to forget about him. & I MEAN, VERY HARD.
pssh. know what?
im so stupid.
im so stupid when it comes to love.
if only i told him what i need to tell him last November the 1st. then what happened in Nov 20 shouldnt have happened. Arggh. I know you wont understand me, but whatever, im just..arr.. really stupid.
Im still not over him
& I dont know if ill be able to get over him soon.
I really hate myself.I hate myself for what i didnt do but should have.Arrgh.
November 1 ,instead of being a gloomy day because of All Saint's Day, could have been one of the best day in my life, at least, November 1 of this year 2006. But instead, i let it pass by, i let the opportunity to experience a best day like that,pass me by.
I just hate the number 20, because of effing November 20. What he said on November 2006, had been the cause of my almost-failing in school nowadays. Not really failing.But, im pretty sure that some of my grades will be low for this 3rd quarter. Darnit. And he said that its better this way so i can concentrate in my studies! What the!? But it was really the other way around. I got worse in school. I wouldnt listen to my teacher's discussions, i dont study for quizzes, i sometimes get low equivalents even for minor quizzes,.
If only he did not said what he had said on November 20, it would have been the other way around, i would have been listening to discussions, getting high grades, .tssk. Inspiration. as they would say.
Haiii.
He already changed. It seems like he's not the same person who i knew. He's not the corny but funny, sweet, thoughtful, "friend" anymore. At least, to me. I guess. He's giving me the cold treatment, as they would say. Its as if he doesnt know me anymore. Wouldnt even reply to my messages, i mean, it was him who said that we should still be friends, & thats what im trying to do, staying friends with him, but he's the one who , i think, doesnt want. He' s avoiding me, i can tell.
But whatever, i better get a good sleep tonight.Tomorrow's Christmas Eve. Oh yea? I dont feel the Xmas spirit, its as if its only an ordinary day. Sigh. Maybe it was cause of the tragedy we suffered. But for me, its the tragedyI suffered, what else? being heartbroken.. Whatever.
